My heart broke. The sadness and hopelessness crept in. The reality of this country, this people, hit me again. This people group is 0.00% evangelized. There are no missionaries. There is no Bible translation in their heart language. Their children will never attend a VBS nor will the parents attend a small group or church service. They have apologetics against Jesus and no one is here to love them enough to speak the truth. They are a minority group here and have laws set against them, not including the reality that the government does not want foreigners interacting with them.

"I will see you in eternity!" Sel says to my team as we leave his house. There is a pit welling in my stomach as I write, knowing that Sel and I will never see each other again unless missionaries faithfully pursue him and his village (where currently there are no missionaries and it is 0% reached and evangelized).

As I stood, waiting for my departure to Southeast Asia, the reality of the next three months hit me.  For three years I had waited for this moment.  I had spent three years preparing, yet I felt completely inadequate for the task ahead of me.  Why me?  Why was I being called to go?

The saying is true, “its so much better being in the passenger seat than driving.” Before I came on this trip, my perspective of missions was limited to building houses, giving out medicine, or handing children gifts. Not to diminish those things, but my perspective of missions has expanded.

We often pass down heirlooms, trades, skills, or maybe businesses. We want to pass down a generation of “Look, what God is doing. Now, be a faithful vessel that continues the work.”

Our team just began a homestay. You can read more about what these are here.

On our first night, we ate with our friend Sam who was a devout cousin. Our conversation with him was very direct. He loved to discuss religion and what he believed. He began to discuss the duty of his belief and how Allah was the one true Father.

If I’m honest, I really had no idea what this program was about until I got here. I had a vague idea that it would help prepare me for future work overseas, yet I didn’t even know what I needed preparation in.

“I’m so impatient.

Sometimes I really hate the pressures of time because my personality always has me dreaming of the future. This creates an urgency in me to get the most out of where I’m at.”