God Breaking my Heart for What Breaks His [Student Story]

As the summer has gone on and the newness of base town has worn off, I have felt the weight of the spiritual darkness that is present here in a new way. Both the darkness of base town and of this country in general has felt a little heavier these past few weeks as a result of being here for an extended amount of time and seeing the true state of brokenness that sin leads to in a culture.

The 99.9% of Muslims that live all around me are not simply a statistic anymore but are the kind faces of my friends: Mary, who works at the local patisserie, Katie, who loves American films, Jasmine from the flower shop, who is always smiling. The task at hand seems more weighty now, but because of it, I have prayed bigger prayers, fasted for my local friends, and grown in confidence of what the Father is capable of doing in their lives, asking Him to use me as a light daily. It seems as if my heart is re-breaking for the lost.

2 weeks ago, our group got to go on a hiking trip through the mountains. We traveled to several villages and stayed with multiple families. The villages in the mountains are UUPG’s so they are not only unreached, but also unengaged villages, isolated from the rest of the country. It was very interesting to engage with a group of different types of people. The people in the mountains were more traditional and tight-knit. They also spoke a different dialect that was very different from the dialect in the base town. Being in these villages encouraged me to pray more for these hidden places, that these small communities would come to know the Father through visions & dreams, and that missionaries would be sent into the harvest as well.

Throughout the hike, I experienced the beauty of the Father’s creation and grew closer to my group mates. I reflected on the restoration that the Father will bring one day to all people!

“It shall come to pass in the latter days that the mountain of the house of the Lord shall be established as the highest of the mountains, and shall be lifted up above the hills;  and all the nations shall flow to it, and many peoples shall come and say; “Come to the mountain of the Lord, to the house of the God of Jacob, that He may teach us his ways and that we may walk in His paths.”

Isaiah 2:2-3

As I read this passage during our hiking week, I got to imagine all nations coming to worship the Father at the highest mountain. This beautiful picture makes me desire this for my local friends and the individuals all over this country, that they would get the opportunity to dwell in the house of the Father that is established as the highest of mountains, and that I would get to one day worship alongside them as their sister.

I have been asking the Father questions that are more specific to my future and where He could be calling me to such as how He wants to combine my love for nursing with my love for overseas work. Seeing the need for medical care in the mountain city has made me curious about what life could be like as a nurse in a rural setting. I have also been praying about what specific locations or people groups He could be calling me to. Being here has given me clarity that I have a heart for Muslims, and I would prefer to live somewhere with a smaller community.

I have grown so much in my dependence on God this summer and have realized the true importance of abiding in Him in order to go somewhere long-term! Through being here and talking with the Father, I have realized the importance of sacrificing my life so that others may know Him. Even in the face of hardship and cultural stress, I have grown in my obedience to the Father. Whatever He has for me, I am devoted to Him and devoted to helping others know Him.